I Spy With My Little Eye

I spy with my little eye

A lady in Iran awaiting her inhumane verdict while another one in Kuwait shopping lavishly for Eid’s clothes

I spy with my little eye

Kids dying of hunger while others having food fights

I spy with my little eye

People greeting and complimenting each other while inwardly despising one another

I spy with my little eye

Preachers asking for peace while recruiting an army to kill those who choose to differ

I spy with my little eye

Ostracized people seeking answers while highly respected and loved ones don’t even know the questions

I spy with my little eye

... 

 

Eid ?

I don't care about the Eid and I can't guarantee that you will have a blessed ( mubarak ) Eid either so please cut the crap we all hate the Eid and its crazy za7ma, not to mention hypocrisy ( at least I do ) . =)

a place like home .. ?

  In a world where money matters and brains shatter freedom is too hard if not impossible to attain,
In a world where people die out of disparity it gets hard at night to even inhale,
In a world where weapons are some people’s only method of surviving it gets painful for kids to play a game, When rights of living are deprived and restricted and shackled; when we know we can never matter we seek a place within our hearts only to feel a mold of somewhere shallow that was never there,
Only in a world of utter confusion a preacher tells us to leave is to never gain.,
Only in a place where birds cant sing and people cant talk do we find plans never touched rested aside somewhere dusty in our brains ….

Perfect / Imperfect

 we can’t deny that having or attaining anything in a perfect state is perfectly impossible, we can’t do anything in a perfect matter, we are weak creatures and our weakness and incapability reflect upon our work , actions ,decisions and consequences , we are incapable of living the perfect ideal life we want and therefore, can never provide others what we can’t to ourselves , the reason why we can’t do that is because of the psyche and nature of the human soul , the duality of good and evil and the constant struggle in between , Aristotle once defined man as a political animal and my interpretation is that a man is an animal whose talks are his only defense against his true nature and even method in hiding it sometimes and perhaps when it comes to a society whose idea of variety and differ is blasphemy then this political animal - man is doomed with nothing but talks to hide his nature and defend it when necessary throughout the entire course of his life.

But where do talks come from? I think they are the production of the inner self loathing tortured psyche of the human nature, we hate who we are but we long for it, and so we can’t help but hate and love and get lost in between our ups and downs, repent then sin to repent and sin again. hate our weakness ,hide it and never confide but dare to demand others to be stronger because we know we can never attain anything perfectly , we can’t shape the perfect sculpture , as much as it might look perfect it never is, at least not to everyone( example; to me Myron’s discobolus statue of the ideal body, is anything but sexy -.-‘) ,and so no dictator can dictate and terrify his people forever , no peace preacher could preach and convince people forever , nothing can be attained in a perfect matter to a perfect time , there is not perfect whether in good or bad , some might argue that if so then there ought to be a perfect combination of two , I would personally thing that the latter statement is missing the adjective imperfect before the word combination, its imperfect because two wrongs don’t make a right nor do two rights make a wrong, so the problem is not in the power of either but the weakness of both. and the sad part is not only do we deny who we are but we also deny others as well, god forbid people allow themselves the right to be true , yet being as paradoxical and self delusional as we are we provide people with false hopes and dreams and offer them a world of possibilities to feel better about ourselves and so the dice of life can be tossed and new members can join, and where is the harm if this life is nothing but a shifty game, as long as no one cares to know better, and those who do, well.. they are in for a long ride. See deep down we can’t allow such world but to be conditional under our own self-incarcerating terms and rules.

the idea of someone loving someone unconditionally not matter what, is completely and utterly vain in my opinion, take the figure of parents as instance , who are incapable of ejecting and abandoning any of their kids , their flesh and blood , now without going into further discussion into the differences between the role of parents in different places , (note role not nature because we can’t allow ourselves to be true to who we are we can however, restrict ourselves with roles and obligations , if you think about it, in a way isn’t what we are doing is deforming god’s pure creation and plan? ) nevertheless , it is no surprise that say a mother would disown her son had he turned out to be gay, her "unconditional" love expires when it comes to her son's homosexuality....?

Bottom line is; this perfect world of a perfect and unconditional love only exists in classrooms where little kids draw pictures of their happy family members holding hands , tied together drawn closer by their smiles forever and ever no matter what. that is something only kids can possibly believe that they honestly believe in . We know better don’t we? As adults we know the sad truth behind fairy tales and what is even sadder (I don’t know why “sadder” always seems wrong), is that some don’t consider it sad at all, and perhaps if I were as logical as I claim to be, or hope, for that matter, then I might have met their point of view as well, but being incapable of attaining anything in a perfect matter as I mentioned before takes the edge off my inability to be as realistic as I ought to be at this mature age of mine. and no matter how hard you love or hate what I’m writing I take comfort in knowing that you can’t hate nor love it perfectly enough to really own up to it , we really are incarcerating ourselves .

Circle

I think that we , Humans, are very desperate restrained sad creatures , we are destined to fail in order to succeed and succeed in order to fail again , we live in a huge circle of void and we constantly try to fill it with meaningless acts , justified by being meaningful, some laugh and smile and put on a perky attitude thinking by doing so they can get the best out of life , others act indifference pathetically thinking they will feel better about their lives knowing how it’s not theirs to begin with, while others search and search for meanings knowing that there is no meaning and there is no truth , others, however, sit back behind their desks in their little messy room and point out others flaws and mistakes thinking they are outsmarting life , others and those are the most deceived, try to act and participate as much as they could in life trying constantly ,day and night ,to fix everything and the saddest thing about that is they are probably the most people on earth that would not benefit of things getting fixed , we are overwhelmed by the greatest injustice of all and denied of the choice to choose ,see people are so desperate and sad they constantly try to occupy their minds with something meaningful in their own little ways , trying desperately to forget that life is death and death is life so every day they live they are not living at all , they are dying and that’s what they don’t want to think about , and that whatever it is that they do now or accomplish doesn’t count for anything but a pathetic meaningless meaningful act of this thing called “living” , we don’t need peace , we don’t need social equality , we need to want it because we don’t have it, so scratch need with want , what we need is not always what we want or think we want , only by destruction we can have a meaningless meaningful life and purpose , we like to wallow in our miseries we like to think that why are trying to make things better by fixing , ignoring , or simply trying to look at the positive aspect of things and that’s the goal of life ,but there is no goal or purpose, in fact, we don’t need any of that because there is no living there is only coming closer to dying , so it’s only rational to rationalize what’s irrational , we want to think we need it , we crave it , everything we do whether demand equal rights or call for peace or reach a hand for someone in trouble we do because we get something out of it , a meaning , an illusion of satisfaction, just like a placebo, so in the end everything we do is induced by selfish desires including what I’m posting and you are reading .